Puzzle Pirates
Oh Puzzle Pirates, why do you tempt me so? You know the last time we dated, I got exceedingly violent at your insolent ways, your stupid ‘bilging’ game and your frustrating ’sailing’ game. But, alas, there’s really nothing like playing drinking games with your mates with a case of frothy(?) grog.
Oh, wait, I know why we broke up. You wanted to charge me $74.95 a year. I spend less on shoes (and they even light up!)
You’re trying to come back into my life, with your e-mailing me three years later, like the girl that drunk-dialed me last week. But I won’t have any of it. I’ve moved on to better things. I guess you could say you booched it.
No, no, I’m impressed, really. I like what you’ve done with yourself. You’ve got a new couple of jobs, like shipbuilding and alchemy. That’s great. I still have feelings for you, like Nicole and Tom. Maybe if we had settled down in the past, had a couple of kids, we’d have that kind of loving-but-despising relationship. But I’m a Leo, you’re a computer game. It just wasn’t meant to be.
Hey, while you’re here, I think I’ve still got some stuff in a closet for you. Let’s see here — aha, right here in a box marked “Plundercats”. Remember those days, those Plundercats? Reckless abandon. The good times.
No, they’re not tears. The box was just dusty.
